turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize