am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
