I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
