Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
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