We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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