I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize