The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
