dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I AM VODKA MAN
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
