You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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