susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
is wine microwaveable?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
