and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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