Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize