maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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