i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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