Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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