Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
