but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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