I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
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