Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
