ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
