if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
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