Kiss
Puke
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize