So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
