There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
