Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
