No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Congratulations! We have a period
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize