yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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