there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i think i scared a bird with my dick
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
