I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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