We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
