It's Friday. Sex?
Just cropdusted the office
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Less talking, more tequila
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
