Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize
