u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize