Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Its about making memories worth repressing
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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