She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
