What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
