they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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