i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
