There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize