yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
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Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
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The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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