Whoa Z and x make the same sound
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
