Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
