Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize