I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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