But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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