put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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