is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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