I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
