Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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