sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
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He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
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I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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